Marrying a Foreigner: Your Formula to Happiness

At some point in a man’s life, the thought of marrying a foreigner would have crossed his mind. Whether through a fanciful daydream or serious contemplation, he entertains the possibility of being in a loving relationship with someone outside of his own race, nationality, and culture.

But because dating a foreign woman is by its very nature outside of the norm, it is only natural for you to wonder and have questions. What is it like? Will we truly get along? Will it last? Is it worth exploring?

At the end of the day, being happy is what we want. If it brings us joy, then it should be worth pursuing, should it not? In order to make that judgment, there are several arguments to look into to see whether being with a foreigner is the path you should take in life.

1. Freedom from your culture’s social baggage

A big reason to want to be with someone foreign is because you want to be with someone who doesn’t think like everyone else you know. You may not necessarily agree with the cultural norms of your country, and you want out.

For example, if you want someone who has a traditional view of femininity, as opposed to a liberally progressive view, then you might want to date a woman from a conservative culture like Asia. Or you could want the opposite and do that as well.

Or what if you don’t want to live in the rat race in your highly urbanized city? What if you don’t want to adhere to your society’s high expectations of money and success? Why not instead be with someone who is more content with the slow and simple life out in the country?

This escape from undesirable cultural expectations and norms goes both ways. One of the reasons many Ukrainian women want to marry foreign men is because they don’t like how Ukrainian men treat them.

If you don’t believe that the culture or people in your country can help you foster the happiness you long for in life, then take the route many have taken, which is to settle down in another country, marry a foreign woman, and never look back.

2. Learning the wisdom of other cultures

Some say traveling is the best way to learn something new. It is when we compare a foreign culture to ours that we learn what is good about us and what we can improve.

Imagine being with a woman from the Philippines. Why is she so enthusiastic about life? Why does she take care of her elderly parents? Why doesn’t she mind spontaneous visits from friends and relatives alike? Are these things that maybe you should try to adopt?

Remember that this is a woman who grew up in a country where faith plays a major part in everyone’s lives. You remember that she has survived earthquakes, typhoons, and poverty. You begin to understand that she is resilient beyond comprehension, despite her petite exterior and mild demeanor.

And guess what? She is learning from you as well. She is learning about your brand of strength, assertiveness, and winning mindset. If you both make the effort, your household will radiate the best of both worlds. Your children will have the best of both worlds.

3. There is fun in discovery

There are two layers to uncover in a foreign woman: her culture and herself. Dating is exciting because discovering things about each other is enjoyable. You begin with very little aside from knowing that there is mutual interest.

The more you unpack about your foreign girlfriend, which is a lot to begin with, the more it feels like a game. At every level of discovery you feel closer, and thus more satisfied with the accomplishment.

Have you ever watched a Russian model do the catwalk and wonder to yourself what it would be like to hang out with her?

So when the time comes that you do get the opportunity, your heart and mind start racing. You start with only what you know, which are probably nothing more than stereotypes. To your amusement, you discover some stereotypes are true, and some aren’t.

Sometimes, dating is a game. And a fun game at that.

4. Lasting beyond the honeymoon stage

Dating is fun and the honeymoon stage is bliss. Many men want to live out the fantasy of marrying a foreign woman, but don’t want the responsibility of living with one.

Set aside scams and insincere intentions. There are other negative effects of marrying a foreigner.

Firstly, it can be a logistical nightmare. Where are you going to live? What career opportunities await the other? What kind of legal work needs to be accomplished?

Once all that has been settled, you then need to contend with both the shock of relocating and the shock of living with someone.

An international marriage is a serious commitment. So when you do marry a foreign woman, take nothing for granted. Make every sacrifice count.

5. Not your differences, but what you share

Before any of you can make life changing sacrifices, remember that you are together not because of your differences, but because of what you have in common. Love, of course, binds you. But it isn’t always obvious, especially when you fight and feel dry.

Imagine marrying a beautiful Chinese lady. Culturally, you have little in common. Your countries’ governments are at odds, and there are times when you can barely understand each other. You’re not exactly a fan of Chinese food and she loathes the overly processed junk you call lunch. Your in-laws? Forget about it.

When things get difficult, try to remember what you love about the woman. You love her determination and discipline. You love that she genuinely cares for your wellbeing. So focus on the things you share, which are bigger than all your differences.

You choose her. You choose to be happy.

You choose to be with a foreign woman because she fits all your criteria. She has everything you want in a life partner, and nothing you don’t. And it makes sense to take the next steps - marry her and start a family.

At the end of the day, her being foreign doesn’t make you happy. SHE makes you happy, and being foreign just so happens to be one of the many wonderful things that she is.